The 2007 Pich’ Awards Ceremony
(The scene is the aging Memorial Auditorium in Burlington, VT. The stage has been slightly extended down the middle of the main floor where a podium and microphone are
set up. A colorful backdrop of linens and sparkles makes all wonder if this is
in fact a gay pride parade. There is also a large screen in the middle of the
stage and also one directly across from the stage facing it. As the crowd settles
in a light fog rolls over the stage. “Set Adrift On Memory Bliss”
by PM Dawn hits as a bigger cloud of smoke comes from the left of the stage. On
a conveyor belt dancing, as he glides, comes The Pich’. He’s dressed
in a white suit with a light blue undershirt matching the stripe on his sweet white bowlers hat. Looking like a cross between an earlier era gangster and a white Usher.
He also sports a cane, which he twirls as he grooves. Finally he jumps
of the conveyor belt and dances towards the podium.)
Pich’: “Welcome everyone
to the 2007 Pich’ Awards. What about this production huh? I’m the only entertainment we could afford after I used most of the budget on our stage and my suit. Oh well, we’ll still have fun. Let’s
get right in to the awards by finding out who can put the F.U. in this show!”
(The screens begin to show a video piece on the nominees for the first
award the written is read by a pleasing baritone voice)
– Alan Maynard – The man known as Big Al added almost every key element of the trip to Buffalo for the NFL
season opener between the Bills and Broncos. A man who practically oozes fun
times he will always make and OK time better. Whether at the races, UVM, or a
superb trip to western NY, Al always creates a jam session of fun. Most notably
making getting a flat tire on an interstate overpass into a raucously hardy time for all.
– Kyle Goyet – After
joining the Talking Trash show full-time in late 2006 Kyle joined Pich’ for many good times on TV. Also the duo had extreme fun at work at UVM, several parties, becoming a WPT regular, celebrating his 21st
B-Day downtown, or even on the trip to see the Broncos Vs. Bills. Whenever fun
can be had you can guarantee that if Kyle won’t put the F.U. in it, that he’s merely a drink or two away.
– Justin St. Louis –
After coming back on the scene more often this year Stain has changed his chief export to F U N. Whether it’s rocking Guitar Hero, the mic at JP’s, or simply in a chair, Justin’s always
up for fun. Late night trips to Montreal, joining Pich’ on the radio, and
general zaniness are never a problem for a St. Louis with less crime than the Gateway to the West.
(Back to Pich’ at the podium holding a framed sheet of high quality
standard printer paper, that is the Pich’ Award.)
Pich’: “And the winner
is.....Kyle Goyet.” (The
crowd applauds but Pich’ stops them by raising his hand) “Kyle would
have loved to be here to accept the award tonight, but he couldn’t get a ride.
I’ll give this to him and maybe he’ll make an acceptance speech later, thank you.”
(The screen fires back up showing the news desk of the hit cartoon series
“Family Guy.” Seated there are Tom Tucker and Diane Simmons
and they begin dialogue.)
Tom: “This just in Diane. It takes two to tango.”
Diane: “Riveting stuff,
Tom. I’d never tango with you.”
Tom: “That’s OK Diane,
I wouldn’t want to catch your raging herpes.”
Diane: “Why did I take
this gig?”
Tom: “Because we’re
here to introduce the Couple of the Year.”
Diane: “Why us Tom? The only good couple on this screen are my magnificent melons.”
Tom: (lifting up two huge
honeydew melons) “They sure are nice Diane.”
Diane: “Give them a squeeze,
Tom. Here are the nominees folks.”
(The screens show the nominees as
the written below is read.)
– Nick and Amy Soutiere – In 2006 the couple got married. In 2007 the couple continued there run of greatness with their first child. Although they make rare appearances due to life in Swanton, this couple is living the American Dream.
– Aaron and Nicki Stata – This duo moved into a new kicking joint
in Milton this year. They also handed over the washer and dryer to Pich’
which was a huge help to the Weav’. Recently the couple got a dog and things
are going well for both’s football teams (Patriots and Browns).
– Karl and Kelly Gilbeau – The couple got married this year and
it was the privilege of Pich’ to video tape the event. A fun time was had
by all as the duo reminded us that you can always meet the person of your dreams in any situation, even a wrestling Pay-Per-View.
(The screen again shows Tom and Diane)
Tom: “Here to tell us the
winner is Blackuweather forecaster, Ollie Williams.”
(Solo shot on Ollie)
Ollie Williams: (yelling) “Gilbeaus”
(As the crowd applauds Tom and Diane, now back on screen, search for the
winners.)
Tom: “They don’t
appear to be here, Diane.”
Diane: “With more on this
we go to Asian Correspondent Trisha Takanawa.”
(Shot of Trisha with mic in lobby.)
Trisha: “Thanks Diane. It appears the couple didn’t make it tonight because Pich’ forgot to tell
them to come. Apparently rumor has it that no nominees are actually here tonight.”
(Shot goes back to the stage where Pich’ stands at the podium. He shrugs.)
Pich’: What do you want
from me? This is a fake awards show after all.
Not that the awards are fake, but.....well you get what I mean...Oh bite me.
On with the awards! We all know that this was a year in which I went on
many trips. I really wanted to nominate them all and choosing this categories
winner was very tough.
(A video plays with highlights from all of Pich’s trips throughout
the year. Then a voice announces the three nominees and after each is a small
piece of it on the screen.)
–Pich’s Great American East Coast Road Trip (Bridgeport, NYC,
Washington D.C., Dover) – (Piece shows playing beruit with cousin Kyle,
Pich’ in Central Park with Danielle, Nationals game winning hit in the 10th, Carl and Pich’ playing
Wii, rained out race on Sunday, and Martin Truex Jr. Celebrating his first Nextel Cup win)
– Piche Bowl XIV with Goyets and Al Maynard (To Western NY for NFL
season opener Broncos at Bills) – (Piece shows shots of Al’s insane
driving, fake bullet holes in car, Pich’ drinking with Bills helmet on, tailgating, the four walking to the stadium,
Elam’s game winning kick, Pich’ eating pancakes, guys driving 4-wheelers, and Al with his Bone gloves driving)
– Weekend in NYC with Danielle and Michelle (New York City) – (Piece shows Pich’ stopped at Triboro bridge, riding the trains, looking at the Empire
State Building, a shot of Pich’ in MSG, Dwight Howard dunking with fury, Pich’ drinking with ladies, a shot from
inside the tranny show, and Pich’ with Chowder the Bunny.)
Pich’: “And after
very careful consideration the winner is....Piche Bowl XIV with Goyets and Al Maynard. I made this tough choice based on overall fun. We were laughing, drinking, eating, or sleeping on this trip. Also
it was where I was introduced to Guitar Hero. The hospitality shown by the Maynard
family made the trip and I don’t know if there could ever be a more perfect football game outcome for me. I was also on TV for crying out loud! Overall it was one of
the better trips I’ve ever been on. The mix of Goyets and Maynards made
for a strange-bedfellows match that turned out a Pich’ Award winner! Thanks
to all who made 2007 a great year on all of my trips.”
(As Pich’ walks off the stage, the screen shows a bunch of clips
from work. Many of the clips feature Pich’ and/or Dave Rogers finally the
screen settles on a goofy smile of Dave)
– Speciality Award Excellence in Leadership – Dave Rogers (voice of Pich’ heard on video of more shots from around UVM) “Whenever I’ve needed something from work I’ve usually been able to get it. I’ve always felt like I can be open with whatever is going on with me. The building has turned around since Dave took over a couple years ago.
Often times because of his joking nature and willingness to work side-by-side with you, you forget that he’s
the boss. He needed help this year, like we all did, and I was honored to be
one of those men in the trenches doing things in and out of my job description to make UVM Athletics the best that it can
be. Although I mostly want to put in my hours and then go home it’s still
a pretty relaxed environment to work in most days due in part to the way Dave runs the show.
Thanks Dave.”
(Voice announces Billy Joe as the next presenter. Out comes Pich’ in his blonde mullet wig with trademark John Deere hat, and wearing suspenders.)
Billy Joe: “Hoooooweee,
this here’s a hootnanny huh? Wow what n’ event this is. Shoot I ain’t seen this many per-dee things together in one area since we herded all them sheep in
to the barn last spring. Dang, look at y’all. Well everyone knows I’ve sort of burst on to the scene this year on the Talking Trash TV program. It’s been fun going in and simply tellin’ it like it is. And today I’m here to tell y’all about three other fellers that burst on the scene of Pich’
in 2007.”
(Screen shows nominees for Newbie Award (Rookie of the Year - Male))
– Matt Goudey – Matt
became yet another VCAM specialst for Talking Trash this year and he was nothing like any other specialist. He helped the show reach new heights. Helping create a commercial,
getting the show online, and getting things to look as professional as possible. Aside
from that hanging out after the show became one of Pich’s favorite parts of the week.
Enjoying conversations with Matt and later Jeff as well. A huge deal is
about to go down with Pich’ getting a computer loaded with tons of goodies from Matt.
A solid rookie effort all the way around!
– Jeff Botas – Jeff
joined the Talking Trash team this year and quickly became the rock that held down the studio.
Aside from producing the show he answered phones, found a way to get the show LIVE online, and added a soundboard and
sometimes his own voice to the show. Also Jeff was the one who told Pich’
about the radio station starting up and his technical support single-handedly saved my computer. The most interesting fact about all of this? Jeff doesn’t
work at VCAM. He volunteers his time to the show, and has become a good friend
in a short time.
– Mark Hunter – The
man at the center of the Piche Bowl XIV trip. He let the guys stay in his house,
drink and eat his food, and taught them to rock. Not to mention the tailgating
at the game which was some of the best Pich’ has ever done! Sadly his Bills
did not win that day, but in the Goyets, and myself Mark did win some men who would do anything for him and his family to
return the tremendous selflessness over that weekend.
(Back to the podium where Billy Joe stands ready to announce the winner)
Billy Joe: “Dang, no wonder
I didn’t make the list of nominees. Thems was good y’all. Well hey here’s your winner of the rookie of the year - male award..... Jeff Botas (Crowd applauds) Heck y’all know Jeff doesn’t
like all the attention so I’ll bring him the award. I’m heading back
to my farm now but y’all check out the list of newcomer ladies here as I go.
(Video plays on the screen of the nominees for the Newbette Award for
Rookie of the Year - Female)
– Julia “Roo” Drost – Pich’ met “Roo” while announcing the UVM Summer Softball Championship game (Roo’s team
won). Later he found out that Roo was a big hockey fan and her roommate is in
fact the captain of the women’s team (Caroline Donahue). Although they
haven’t hung out of the Athletic Campus yet she made a great impact by taking her first ride on the Zamboni with Pich’,
and always bringing that lovely smile around the workplace.
– Michelle Henry –
Pich’ met Michelle when she came to Vermont for the first time with Danielle.
That visit was amazing and led to Pich’s trip to NYC in November. Michelle’s
personality, sense of comedy, and unique giggle made her a person Pich’ wanted to see more of. The first person Pich’ ever met from the great state of Washington, was even a great tour guide on
Pich’s NYC trip.
– Danielle Lapierre –
Nick Wilder’s girlfriend sure does love to have fun. Pich’ has attended
a couple of gatherings at her place and had a great time. She also joined the
gang on ice for a rumpus hockey game at Gutterson. She’s a solid gal who
has lit up the world of Pich’s good buddy Wilder.
(Pich’ walks out from the back in a black suit now. A little more traditional but a new style of fedora hat which has a stripe of orange to match his pocket
square, and under shirt)
Pich’: “And the winner
is... Michelle Henry (crowd applauds) Pich’ again stops the crowd. Michelle is in NYC, and cannot be here to accept the award but rest assured she is
jumping up and down after hearing this news, but then she calms down and tells herself she knew she had it in the bag in November.
(The theme from Chariots of Fire begins to play. The Pich’ Hall O’ Fame logo appears on the screen. Pich’
then speaks over the song.)
Pich’: “Throughout
the years there have been many people who have helped shape my life. The Hall
of Fame is my way of thanks those who have made a long-lasting impact over the years.
Here is the criteria.”
(Pich’ motions to the screen and the points come up as he reads
them. Very Power-Point presentation of him!)
- Persons must have at least ten years
of experience with Pich'
- Persons must have had a long-lasting,
positive impactful effect on the Pich'
- Family members are important, and
they are all assumed members of the Hall O' Fame, the purpose of "The Hall" is to recognize those unrelated to Pich'
- Being in the Hall O' Fame does not
"retire" those named from current or future Pich' Awards which is a separate entity
Pich’: I’ll announce
the first class of ten at the conclusion of tonight’s show. (Music stops) Now let’s welcome back from the future a couple of buddies. From the hit show “Futurama” here’s Philip J. Fry, and Bender.
(Pich’ motions towards the screen and there is Fry in a tuxedo t-shirt
and bender with his magnetic bow tie and cigar.)
Fry: “Hey there. We’ve got these awards to hand out
for the best comeback of ’07.”
Bender: “Bite my shiny metal ass.”
Fry: “Bender, why’d you say that?”
Bender: “Whenever I say my catchphrases my appearance cost goes up.”
(The nominees for the Male Comeback of the Year are shown.)
n Weav’ Poker Tour – After being gone for about 7 full months the Weav’ Poker Tour returned to the scene. Once again back in it’s Monday spot the series didn’t bring in big numbers, but resumed where
the fun had left off. Now once again every Monday you can count on poker action
that will blow your mind at the Weav’!
n MC Ingram – After being gone with the army MC returned as a much more psychically fit fella with freedom from relationship. Although he never stays around long his goofy smile, Guitar Hero chops, and fancy
for picking up ladies using the internet makes him a solid ’07 comeback!
n Justin St. Louis – Here’s a guy who had pretty much fallen off the radar.
He had his job, girlfriend, kid, and good living arrangement and was in essence “funblocked.” He made the decision to make a change and with that change he came back into our lives. Joining the fellas at the Weav’ almost daily.
(Back to Fry and Bender)
Fry: (Trying to read from
the envelope) “Juice-tin Stlouis?”
(Crowd Applauds and then Bender jumps in)
Bender: “Did you just call
me a Juice tin loser? Why I oughta..” (Bender rears back to punch Fry but
then instead whips his hand forward and grabs the Pich’ Award) “Sounds
like we have a winner!” (He opens the door to his front and slides the award inside.)
Fry: “Whatever…Here
are the female nominees. They are way hotter than ole Juice-tin over here.”
(points at Bender)
(The nominees for Comeback Female of the Year are shown)
n Jessica Buchanan – Jess came back in to the mix and brought back her maiden name too. Although
it was a rocky year for her it was good to see her and for a while she was Pich’s Thursday night hook-up for fun. Always a good close friend no matter how much time apart Jess was a comeback like
no other.
n Rachael
Horne – Another lady who had a rough year actually came back into the fold
due the tragic loss of her mother (see I Will Remember You page for more on her). Rachael
has since disappeared again, but it’s clear that she and Pich’ will never be out of each other’s lives.
n Chantal Shanley – Thanks to MySpace Chantal, formerly Vaillancourt, made her return to the life of Pich’. Late in the year they even got together for the first time in over 5 years!
Pich’ is stoked that Chantal is accessible again because she is one of the people that has always gotten him.
(Back to Bender and Fry)
Bender: (grabbing the envelope
away from Fry) “Let me take that. And
the winner is….Jessica Buchanan!”
(Crowd applauds as Bender swipes the award and runs of screen singing
“I love stealing, I love takin’ stuff.”)
Fry: “Say Pich’, that was sort of the ex-girlfriend category, huh?”
Pich’: (Now back on
stage looking at the screen) “Yeah how’s that dating Leela thing working
out for ya?” (He points a remote at the screen and turns it off) Hey folks don’t you turn us off. We’ll be back with the Performance and Most Memorable Moments of the year, along with the MVP’s
and the first Hall O’ Famers when we come back.
(As the screen fades to commercial the following is displayed on screen:
Up next: Guitar Hero Rockers hand out some hardware. The screen goes to black and while at commercial the screen displays pictures and titles of winners
of past Pich’ Awards. After a while the screen goes back to black as announcer
speaks.)
Announcer: “Ladies and
Gentlemen please welcome from Guitar Hero, Izzy Sparks and Judy Nails!”
(On the screen walks star guitar clad Izzy Sparks in his Neon Knight outfit. Judy Nails and her schoolgirl outfit come with a stylish light blue guitar. The two begin to play pieces some classic Guitar Hero hits. They
lead with Mississippi Queen, then Hold on Loosely. Next were pieces of Through
the Fire and the Flames, and I Love Rock and Roll. They closed with Carry on
my Wayward Son, and Welcome to the Jungle. Then the two set down their guitars
and head to a podium on the stage they just rocked.)
Izzy Sparks: “Not bad rocking
for a girl.”
Judy Nails: (Glaring up and
down at his outfit) “I agree you did a nice job. Here are the nominees for Performance of the Year.”
(The Nominees appear on the screen.
As each is shown, the screen plays highlights of the events as the following is read.)
n Ed Companion fractures vertebrae in crash
at T-Road – Although the outcome was gruesome for Ed, the crash was spectacular. It was replayed many times including being one of the top videos of the year on WCAX
Channel 3. This might be the last time Ed gets in a race car but what a way to
go!
n Wayne Thompson enables Pich’ to
make mad cash on Ebay – It was no secret that the UVM firesale became a huge
part of Pich’s ’07 success. Thanks to a lot of help from Wayne Thompson,
Pich’ was able to take things to a new level. The garage at the Weav’
still isn’t empty!
n Pich’ falls just short of becoming
just the third man to eat the Holy Smokes Breakfast at Coop’s in Belmont, NY
– This breakfast seems normal at first, but then gets ugly as four insane-sized pancakes make their way to the fold. Pich’ gave all he could until no more room was available. It was still considered to be a top 5 of all-time attempt in Coop’s history.
(The screen comes back to Izzy and Judy who open the envelope and spin
it to show it being blank. Suddenly a phone rings and Izzy answers, and nods
a few times. He closes the phone.)
Izzy Sparks: “Ladies and
Gentlemen we have a winner not from the nominee list. The winner is….”
(The screen shows the Guitar Hero loading screen for “Suck My Kiss”
by the Red Hot Chili Peppers. Then fades out to show Justin St. Louis rocking
out to the song. Jumping on furniture and pelvic thrusting like a man possessed.
As highlights of this continue…)
Izzy Sparks: “Justin
St. Louis for his rendition of Suck My Kiss!”
(The video continues to play and then fades out. However the song continues and out comes Pich’ again in his familiar suit but this time with green
highlights all-around and a Guitar Hero controller which he rocks with on his way to the podium.)
Pich’: “Wow! That was fun thanks to Izzy and Judy for that.
I’m going to hand out the rest of the awards myself tonight. Mostly
because these are all very important, and I wish to speak to you all about the nominees and winners in person. However, I will be assisted with the next award so please welcome direct from his den in the Patrick Gym,
UVM Mascot, Rally Cat!”
(Out comes Rally Catamount with his hockey jersey on. He stands next to Pich’)
Pich’: “Hey Rally
thanks for coming. I think even you could agree that big moments in the past
mostly revolved around sports. (Rally nods) This year is no exception. In fact
there were so many memorable moments this year there are four nominees!
(Pich’ motions to the screen and as they come up they are accompanied
by video highlights. Pich’ reads the following on each…)
Most Memorable Moment of the Year
n Nationals win in extra innings over Padres – It was my first time seeing the Washington Nationals (formerly the Expos) and I was joined
at the game by friend, Carl Aube. The game was very good and it became my first
extra inning game ever. Then with a single that scored a man from third the game
was over sending RFK Stadium fans wild!
n Broncos
kick last second field goal to win 15-14 in Piche Bowl XIV – I’m not
sure there could have been a more exciting ending to a game. The field goal team
rushes out without timeouts and just gets the snap off for the winning kick! It
doesn’t get much closer than that.
n Magic defeat Knicks in MSG – I was excited to make my first trip inside Madison Square Garden, and what better way to
do so than watching my beloved Magic dunk all over the Knicks?
n UVM wins first game Pich’ drives
Zamboni for – After losing the night before 9-1 to much hated Boston University,
the Cats looked for redemption as I made my Men’s Game Driving debut. The
Cats responded with a 5-4 win that meant a lot to me personally.
(Focus comes back to Rally and Pich’ who share a quick high five. Then Rally takes the Pich’ hat off, rubs his thinning hair, and grabs the guitar
and runs off rocking.)
Pich’: (Trying to fix the
mess on his head.) “Damn crafty little feline. Anyway the winner is…Broncos kick last second field goal to win Piche Bowl XIV. I’ll accept the award on behalf of the Broncos. No moment might ever be as sweet as sitting 4 rows from in between the posts as the
last second field goal come through for a Bronco victory. I guess maybe if it
came over the Patriots instead of my also beloved Bills, but nonetheless a huge moment for me.”
(The screen begins to play video clips of Pich’s Grandfather, Ron
Fontaine. Then it stops on a goofy pic of him as the words: Ronald Fontaine Award
- Most Inspirational Person to Pich’)
Pich’: “This award
means a lot to me obviously. The people who influence me are a great source of
support, joy, and pushing me to succeed at whatever I do. This year all of the
nominees are folks who affected my life in a positive way, and that made this a hard decision for me. Here they are.”
Most Inspirational to Pich’
n Matt Goudey – Matt came in to VCAM and immediately began to have a positive affect on not only me, but also Talking Trash
as a whole. He made it fun to be there in a time where my interest was beginning
to sour. He helped not only the show, but me as well, to learn more about the
equipment and how to make it work for us. Late in the year we struck a deal and
I bought a computer from him to try and work more on video editing from home. Aside
from all of that listening to Matt tell stories gives me that feeling like I need to get out and do more, and accomplish the
things I want to do.
n Clara Piche – Always an extreme supporter of me my grandmother inspired me in a whole new way in ’07. Aside from getting to attend her 85th birthday party in Florida in February, I realized something
about my grandmother in the face of a near tragedy. She had some heart trouble
in December including two heart attacks. With all that surrounded her in those
days and still now in her recovery I realized that if an 85-year-old woman can still get out of bed and get after it each
day, than so can I. If that doesn’t motivate your young ass, what will?
n Justin St. Louis – Justin has always been a savvy friend I could turn to. This year
his personal actions inspired me in many ways. Getting the nerve to talk to ladies,
showing me humility in his personal choices, having experience and drive to work on our radio show, or simply being able to
enjoy life no matter what that means at the time. His self-restraint in certain
areas this year flat out amazed me.
(Shot goes back to Pich’ at the podium)
Pich’: “Again this
was a tough selection, but the winner is…. Matt Goudey” (Crowd claps)
“I intend to present Matt his award on an upcoming episode of Talking Trash, where I’ll also give Jeff Botas his
awards from earlier tonight. Stay tuned then to see if either will make a speech.”
(The screen begins to show the Female MVP’s of year’s past. As it gets to last year’s it stops and then Pich begins again.)
Pich’: “Ladies, ladies,
ladies. There were certainly quite a few women who played key roles in my year. Let’s meet the few nominated for the Female MVP.”
(The screen shows this year’s nominees as Pich’ reads a little
about each one.)
n Cara Gorman – Last year’s MVP was back again this year, and she experienced some changes in her life that kept things
interesting. No matter how little our time together, Cara and I have always had
a great ability to be there for each other when needed. You can’t coach
that, but seriously… I sneak short jokes in on her all the time but her
impact on my life is anything but small.
n Danielle Dufresne -- I didn’t see Danielle much this year but her presence was felt
in many ways. Being my hostess in to visits to NYC, bringing fun back to VT on
a couple of visits, and making me realize that I need to get out of Vermont. Not
that she talked me into it, but seeing her in the city kind of gave me that positive light on someone from our area adapting
to the big city. Another solid source for advice, and one of my “go-to
gals” whenever I need one, Danielle and I will always be solid friends.
n Jess Buchanan – Yet another gal that I saw it spurts throughout ’07, Jess and I always have that unique ability to pick-up
right where we left off. You’ll have that over 11+ years of friendship. Her rocky year, meant being there for a support system, moving man, and even cat catcher. No matter where we go or what may come Jess and I will always be close friends.
(Back to Pich’ at podium)
Pich’: “She didn’t
make the nominees this year due to her moving, but it should be mentioned that Alicia Frost-Kolva was also a solid female
of importance in ’07. Long live Frosty Taint! Inside joke… but anyway all of these ladies are really the closest females to me. In the past few years I haven’t had much female interaction other than my buddies girlfriends, not
that kind of interaction sickos. Anyway what I’m trying to say is thanks
to all the non-y-chromosome-having members of my posse. However there has to
be a winner and for the second straight year that’s Cara Gorman! Cara has
“talked me off a ledge” a time or two. Not to mention I like being
one of her “go-to guys” in case of anything. Thanks for everything
Cara!
(Screen shows Cara with last year’s award and then begins to show
the past Male MVP winners.)
Pich’: “This one is going to go a little different this year. Aaron
Stata is one of my closest friends of all-time. I feel our bond will always be
strong no matter what. I don’t know what I’d do without his support. Ed Companion has been like a brother to me over the past few years. Oh the laughter we’ve shared. Kyle Goyet and I have
felt quite brotherly as well over the past year. His presence at work makes it
a lot cooler to me there most days. Even Justin St. Louis, who has been an award
whore tonight, has been another fella I’d hate to be without. All of these
guys, ad many others helped make ’07 a great year, however I struggled with this award more than any other. I had to think honestly who was the most valuable male to me in ’07.
I kept coming back to the one person that was there for EVERY step of this past great year. The person who was there in the dark days, and helped me stay strong as the good came slowly. Honestly I had to do something I hate to do with the Pich’ Awards.
And that is naming myself the ’07 Male MVP. It’s not to slight
anyone else. More to reward myself for a great year in which I hibernated a bit,
lost touch with a lot of folks, and concentrated on me and my future. That done
let’s move on to the night-cap with our inaugural Hall O’ Fame induction.
(Screen shows the Hall O’ Fame symbol as Chariots of Fire begins to
play.)
Pich’: I will now list
the ten members of the first Pich’ Hall O’ Fame, and afterwards include a brief description of what they did to
deserve this honor. Ladies will be named by their maiden names if they apply.
(As Pich’ names each a video montage of them plays with highlights
from their interaction with Pich’)
Pich’: I couldn’t
start this thing off with anyone different than Jason Lestage. Jay and I go way
back, just get him drunk and he’ll tell ya. Over the years he’s been
a great friend, neighbor, roommate/landlord, and on camping trips back in the day even a great fake brother. We did tons of stuff together over the years and I could fill a book with the great experiences we shared. I’ve always thanked him for being a positive role model that kept us both out
of trouble for most of our formidable years. Although we don’t see each
other too often now I still feel like Jay and I will always stay in touch and always be there if the other is in need.
I couldn’t have Jay in here without adding Tom Jackman. Tom, Jay, and I were quite the trio growing up. There were
times in the summer I spent more time at his house than mine. I might have never
become a wrestling fan had it not been for Tom and his family taking me to my first show.
I don’t see Tom much anymore but we always share a hug and a memory or two.
Where would I have been in the early days of CHS football practice huddles,
without Josh Goyet? He was an interesting young lad who had a lot of similar
traits to me. We became fast friends and later roommates, and even co-workers. We’ve shared many ups-and-downs over the years, and I’ll admit there are
some things about him even I still don’t understand. But I do know I couldn’t
have made it without him along the way. Josh is currently injured and away from
work but I see him often and he asked me to be in his wedding in the fall of ’08.
I met this next guy through Jay oddly enough and it turned out to be a relationship
that would see good, bad, and evil. We were Driver’s Ed partners, members
of the football team, co-workers, friends, and roommates. Even though we’ve
been through a lot over the years Bill Morin makes this group simply for having the grace enough to except the apology of
a man who wronged him quite some time ago (Pich’ points to self). Bill
has recently become a father but I don’t see him much anymore. However
I will always be there if “Biff” needs anything!
Back when I really got to know Bill he was part of a fearsome duo with Nick
Wilder. Nick and I meshed well because of our same taste in ladies, and humor. To say we had some good times would be to cut that story short. I still see the big man from time to time and yes he still does the nipple pinch thing.
Knowing Bill and Nick brought me in the presence of the last five members
to be added. Chantal Vaillancourt was my first serious girlfriend. We were friends first and it sort of turned into more. Aside
from our relationship we had many fun times together and in many ways I look back at what we had with great fondness. It was a great way to get my feet wet with the ladies.
We made tons of mistake like kids will do, but we’re better off for it.
I recently saw Chantal for the first time in about 5 years over the break and thanks to that visit and online doings
we can keep in better touch now.
Jess Downs joined Chantal and I in a powerful group we called M.O.P. (Moose
–Jess Ox-Chantal Piche-Me) Our trip to Florida in late June/early July once was one of the best dumb ideas ever. I learned a lot on that trip and we always had tons of fun. Jess was a very close friend to me and we had ups-and-downs because of my crush on her for a time but all-in-all
it was a good time to remember. I haven’t seen Jess in awhile but I heard
she’s married and I’d still consider her a friend to this day.
Jess Buchanan was my first crush in the “Sophomore buddies” group. After a 3 day dating excursion in H.S. we’ve been friends ever since. In fact I took her to her senior prom. Jess is one of the
most caring people I know and if there’s a week there’s either a birth or a funeral that she’s attending. I haven’t seen Jess in awhile but I know she’s doing better now than she
was in the middle of ’07.
Nick Soutiere is one of the best dudes I’ve ever had the privilege
of knowing. He and I have shared a room a few times and really get to know a
dude when he’s listening to Celine Dion at 50 decibels at 2am. I kid but
I always thought he was a great guy and was always there for me. I was honored
to be in his wedding a couple years ago. He recently had a child and things are
going well for the guy.
Finally my current roommate Ed Companion.
We’ve dated so many of the same girls it’s ridiculous, but all that aside we grew in to pretty good friends. Some of his racing love rubbed off on me and my wrestling love on him. No matter what is going on in my life, or the world, I can always count on Ed to make me laugh. Obviously Ed is doing pretty well and it’s easy to keep up with the guy across the hall.
There they are folks. The first
ten in to the Hall O’ Fame! This concludes are festivities tonight. Thanks for coming. It really means a
lot to me. Join us next year, and my best to everyone in ’08!
(As the Pich’ begins to walk off stage “Let it Whip” by
the Dazz Band begins to play. He stops and begins to dance. He invites folks on stage as the credits roll on the screen thanking everyone and recapping the awards. Fun ensues!)
